Tech Classics

A former co-worker e-mailed me with a funny update to a ticket that an IT tech had posted in their help desk. He called him a "George."

If you are in IT, you need to read the Chronicles of George for classics like "anti norton virus service" and "she would like to get nt network installed on her desktop, bah just replace it."

Also giving, as you might guess from the title, IT techs a good name is the Bastard Operator from Hell. He has been a role model to many. A typical interaction with him would go like this:

Another user rings.

"I need more space" he says

"Well, why not move to Texas?" I ask

"No, on my account, stupid."

Stupid? Uh-Oh..

"I'm terribly sorry" I say, in a polite manner equal to that of Jimmy Stewart in a Weekend Family Matine Feature "I didn't quite catch that. What was it that you said?"

I smell the fear coming down the line at me, but it's too late, he's a goner and he knows it.

"Um, I said what I wanted was more space on my account, *please*"

"Sure, hang on"

I hear him gasp his relief even though he'd covered the mouthpeice.

"There, you've got *plenty* of space now!"

"How much have I got?" he simps

Now this *REALLY* *PISSES* *ME* *OFF*! Not only do they want me to give them extra space, they want to check it, then correct me if I don't give them enough! They should be happy with what I give them *and that's it*!

Back into Jimmy Stewart mode.

"Well, let's see, you have 4 Meg available"

"Wow! Eight Meg in total, thanks!" he says, pleased with his bargaining power

"No" I interrupt, savouring this like a fine red at room temperature, with steak, extra rare, to follow; "4 Meg in total.."

"Huh? I'd used 4 Meg already, How could I have 4 Meg Available?"

I say nothing. It'll come to him.

The BOFH is famous for his excuses. If you need some help with coming up with an explanation for a user, you can try the BOFH Excuse Generator.

Baofeng UV-3R: Work-around to UV-3R Will Not Stop Transmitting

Julian, G4ILO, is at it again with some good information for a problem that has cropped up on a couple of rigs.

Symptom
After sending and releasing the PTT button, the radio continues to transmit. It happens on VHF, using the supplied microphone/ear piece, and the Menu Item 7 Power set to "High".

Cause
RF is leaking into the PTT circuit via the wire.

Workaround
1. Switch Menu Item 7 Power to "Low" or
2. Wind a couple of turns of the microphone cable on to a split ferrite.

And He Will Make Millions

Ja'Juan Story is a 4-star college football player. I'm not sure what is funnier in this interview - his blunt honesty or his taste in music.

$60 Ziplock Bag for iPad

As an iPad owner, I feel free to criticize dumb iPad accessories like the DryCase. It makes my brain hurt on so many levels, not the least of which is the fact that you can't read the iPad in direct sunlight anyway. They say it can be used by Kindle owners, too, but I feel like Kindle people are more practical and less prone to be a sucker to marketing.

Via Lifehacker

Knoxville is Big Time

First, we find out that Knoxville is getting a Publix. Now it sounds like we are getting a Costco and a Whole Foods. The scruffy little city continues to catch up to the rest of the world.

Organic Egg Scorecard

My supplier of eggs doesn't show up on the rankings of organic egg producers. Makes me think we need to get some government inspectors over there PDQ!

Here are the criteria for the Organic Egg Scorecard Ratings (PDF).

Via Lifehacker

Life Lesson: Label Keys

Label your keys.

Otherwise you may end up with a drawer full of keys and have no idea what they unlock. And the funny thing is that I don't have a single house key!

Blogger's Poor Man's Backup

After the mishap with Blogger, I thought I might want to check out my backup options. I can manually download an XML file of the entire blog, but that depends on me to do something. I suspect there are cool tools to do a backup, but for now, I've just subscribed myself to the blog, so I get an e-mail with the current posts. That at least gets me the text, so I wouldn't have to rewrite a post.

Depending on Gmail, a Google service, to backup Blogger, a Google service, what could go wrong?

Baofeng UV-3R: Battery & AA Battery Case

Alternate Batteries
The UV-3R comes standard with a 1500 mAh battery with a stated run time of 10 hours. There are reports that this a common camera battery and you can use the NP60 and SLB1037 as a replacement. I will verify once I can lay my hands on the parts.

AA Battery Case
Some people have had good luck using an AA battery case for the Yaesu VX-3R, part #FBA-37, with their UV-3R. I've got the Yaesu part and have ordered another knock-off one from eBay. RPComms43 posted pictures indicating that a small modification had to be made to the plastic case before it would fit. Again, once I have the parts in place I will update and show how it worked for me.

I will once more suggest joining the UV-3R Yahoo Group. These guys are smarter than me and have been really great at getting answers to those that ask.

Maps and Character Locations

Obviously, I have been reading George RR Martin's Not a Blog today. He links to a Spanish site that includes a map of character location by episode. Pretty cool.

I had a similar idea when reading his A Song of Ice and Fire books, but was thinking more about locations based on the fictional date. Some of the chapters in the books overlap so chapters aren't perfect for defining a point in time either. Someone with a little technical savy and some time could map out the locations and then allow you to click "play" and watch them move around Westros. Given the number of characters and locations this would be a slick compliment to the books. You could even move back and forth through time to watch the relative movement of characters. Imagine using something like that to map out Heroes or Back to the Future.

As I mentioned before, the title scene does a good job of giving an overview of Westeros. If I was a good writer, I would have said it like this:

"From the spires of King's Landing and the godswood of Winterfell, to the frozen heights of The Wall and windy plains across the Narrow Sea, Elastic's thunderous cartographic flight through the Seven Kingdoms offers the uninitiated a sweeping education in all things Game of Thrones.

- Will Perkins, Contributing Author"

The above quote is from an article on the Game of Thrones intro at The Art of the Title Sequence. The article includes a video of the intro along with several good pictures of various components of the sequence.

And it sounds like my speculation that the intro would change based on the locations of the characters is correct. Plus one for me!

"At this point, we made a list of the locations we needed to build. Then we figured out how many different versions of the sequence we would need to create, the idea being that the opening title would show you all the places you would visit in each episode. And we boiled it down to four different sequences, each a subtle variation."

I'm loving the series. I can't believe we have seen five episodes already, but I'm glad we have several more and a whole second season!

Art of the Title Sequence info via Not a Blog